A Creative Writing Activity

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Activity and Justification—Valerie Zane

Activity:

Part One: Taking no longer than five minutes and keeping your words to under a page in length, write your autobiography. Part Two: Next, using the same time and length limits as in Part One, write your biography from a parent or parental figure’s point of view.

The narrative can be fact or fiction and written in any genre or style of choice. Let your imagination lead the way. Be as descriptive and creative as possible while paying close attention to narrative and voice.

Justification:

The purpose of this exercise is to inspire creativity and flex writing muscles while focusing on narrative and voice and keeping to a tight deadline and length limits. 

I like this exercise because it forces the writer to step in and then out of his or her own head and immediately into someone else’s head but on the same topic. The students can approach this exercise in any way they wish—serious or comedic, fact or fiction, essay or poetry, for a few examples. Any way it is approached, the exercise will stretch the creative muscles much like a 10 minute warm-up loosens the legs before a long run.

Also, by focusing on voice and narrative from both the student’s own and someone else’s point of view, but someone close and familiar like a parent or parental figure, it allows the student to get deep quickly and in a short period of time and space. In the first part, the student tells his or her own story. In the second part, he or she tells basically that same story but from someone else’s point of view. The most important aspect of both parts is the narrative itself, including actions, descriptions and voice.  

In the lecture this week, we learned “Another thing that a master craftsperson shares is perspective. This is not only helping students see subjects from new angles, but also guiding them to useful ways of thinking about skills, tools, or processes. It is a way to encourage productive ideas and discourage unproductive ones.”  In many ways, this is an exercise in perspective. By telling a story from two different perspectives, the students are able to explore their creativity and thoroughly inspect and play around with these unique perspectives. It will be interesting to see the difference between what students will write about themselves versus what they think their parents would write.

Finally, much like King uses his close personal relationships, memories and experiences to weave his stories, this exercise allows the student to do the same. By getting personal, so to speak, in a similar way and also from someone else’s (in this case, a parent’s) point of view, while under tight time and length constraints, it gives the writer the freedom to be creative without being self-conscious.

Traditional Writing Workshops and “Stephen King – On Writing”

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The traditional model of teaching creative writing may work for the majority but there will always be exceptions, due to personality, skill level and work ethic differences. I think it’s been so successful over the years primarily because of its simplicity. Get a bunch of writers together in one place to study, review each other’s work and share information, tricks-of-the-trade and experiences, and you’re bound to get interesting and thoughtful feedback and opinions.

I have had both positive and not-so-positive experiences with traditional writing workshops. While I’ve gotten a lot of good out of them, I do not believe they stack up to the “ideal.” Personally, I found it challenging to read and review so many other writers while also focusing on my own writing. In one particular workshop I participated in, students would need to review 120+ pages of text each week. This made it challenging for everyone, I think, to get their own creative juices flowing since we were spending so much time reading and critiquing each other. Also, it became clear rather quickly that not everyone was reading (or thoroughly reading) everyone else’s work. The time and energy involved, added to the fact that everyone has different interests and work ethics, made it tempting for some to simply agree with what someone else in the circle may have said. I think the element of group think in these traditional workshops can be challenging to overcome. For that reason, I believe one-on-one feedback, blind feedback or even online workshops can be more valuable to a writer’s growth because the group think mentality is eliminated and students needn’t worry about what others in the circle say, think or how they react nonverbally. In a nutshell, people tend to be more open and honest when others aren’t watching.

I found King’s book useful. I thought it was interesting, for one, to get an honest sneak peek into the mind of another writer, especially one with King’s level of success. He shared some crazy stories from his childhood (Eula-Beulah, p19-21, will stay with me forever) and also gave unique insight into critical writing elements (i.e., theme, p200, pacing, p220, research, p227). Although the book felt, at times, more like an autobiography than a memoir on craft (King himself made that note on p17), King’s storytelling caused me to realize that I should use my own memories for inspiration, as well.

Feeling Silenced

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Every writer, at one point or another, feels silenced. The classroom should be a safe place that promotes the growth of creativity, not work against it.

There have been times when I’ve felt “silenced.” I took one class, for example, where some of the other students were (or seemed to think they were) too advanced for the class. I felt intimidated and mocked by their comments and while this pushed me to toughen up and expand my knowledge, I struggled and even felt afraid to share my “lesser quality” work. In this particular case, the teacher added to the problem by constantly putting those students on pedestals and ignoring others.

In chapter four of “What Our Speech Disrupts,” Haake tells the story of a time when she was silenced by her own insecurities. She says, “Now, under the spell of Melville’s prose and genius, my future, stark as destiny, seemed clear to me. I was neither smart nor talented enough to be, as I had dreamed, a writer.” She gave up writing for four years. Looking at this in a classroom setting, a student could easily feel inferior to other students, the teacher and even famous writers and their works (like Moby Dick in Haake’s case). The feeling of inferiority can silence a student and even halt creativity. Later Haake goes on to say, “For most of us, by the time we lapse into silence, we are past the point of caring.” No matter the size of the dream or aspiration, just as we can be held back by physical issues and threats we, too, can be held back by mental and emotional ones. Creativity is both powerful and delicate in that in can move mountains but something as light as a feather can disrupt or destroy it.

An open, nurturing, non-competitive environment is necessary in preventing this. Much like a mother loves all of her children unconditionally, with all their unique qualities, a teacher must create a similarly supportive, safe environment, where students aren’t afraid to share their deepest thoughts, fears and dreams. Additionally, it’s important to make sure students know there are no “stupid” questions or “bad” writing and that everything they say or share is valuable, valid and good. Validation and grading are, of course, necessary but should be done in an honest, constructive and positive way. No student should be put above or below another student. The class should feel like a team with everyone working toward the same goal.

Since creativity is subjective, who is to say what work is “better” or “worse” than others? For this reason, students should be primarily graded by their own growth and how they express their point of view. A good argument, especially one creatively expressed, is worth more than perfectly regurgitated information. Much like it’s futile to compare apples to oranges it’s also futile to compare creative writing students to each other.

Creativity needs room to grow. It also requires time and inspiration. By providing a time and place where students feel safe, they can be free to be inspired.

I believe failure often lies in generalization. It seems to me that different approaches work for different people, so why not create a model that does, too? Much in the way kitchen cabinets can be “custom” built to meet individual needs, why couldn’t a workshop? I’d propose different classes to target specific qualities, rather than a broad range of “everyone.” Unique class descriptions, for example “workshop for beginner romance novelists” or “workshop for advanced comedic storytellers” or even something as simple as “critical creative boot camp” or “friendly feedback for all” might help people choose where they believe they’d fit, feel most empowered to participate and safest to share.

In chapter nine of “Colors of a Different Horse,” Sarbo and Moxley say, “Our current understanding of creativity shapes and limits the ways in which we can effectively intervene in our students’ creative process and leads inevitably to a clarification of our role as teachers. Familiarity with creative research increases our sensitivity to the negative effects of external evaluation; fortifies our tolerance for each student’s unique personality style, work habits, and writing process; and prepares us to supplement these preferences appropriately.”

If each student is indeed unique, then the fruit is found in unique approaches which would allow students to feel safe and really dive deep into their creativity without concern of being unfairly compared to other writers, by others or by themselves, like apples are to oranges.

Works Cited

Bishop, Wendy and Ostrom, Hans. Colors of a Different Horse. Chapter 9.

Haake, Katherine. What Our Speech Disrupts. National University. Chapters 4 and 6.

Chinatown: Jake and Mrs. Mulwray

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Private Investigator JJ “Jake” Gittes is the perfect protagonist. He is patient, savvy, brave, sexy, playful and smart (the pocket watch trick was great!). 

What does he want? Gittes wants the truth and he wants to be respected for making an honest living. In his own words: “I don’t want to be a local joke.” He is a good guy disguised as a publicity loving, dirt-digging private investigator who only cares about money. As the film opens he appears to get off on ruining marriages for money but that’s really not the case. Though he makes a good living, he isn’t in it just for the money. He’s actually a decent guy who values truth and also wants to help people. This is proven when he decides to stick to the investigation even after the “real” Mrs. Mulwray shows up threatening to sue him. When the girl in the photo with Mr. Mulwray (who at this point we are led to believe is the alleged girlfriend) goes missing and Mr. Mulwray also can’t seem to be found, Jake seems genuinely concerned. 

The action: At the police station, he goes along with Mrs. Mulwray’s story that she indeed hired him. He could have told the truth to the cops but he doesn’t. This shows he either trusts her, likes her or he needs her for something. Maybe at this point, he isn’t even sure which. Later in the restaurant, he accuses her of being upset about more than her husband’s death. He senses she’s hiding something. He questions her until she “admits” cheating too though she doesn’t say with whom and seems to be lying. Outside he confronts her again about her husband’s murder and reveals his suspicion of a conspiracy, then says he knows she’s not being 100% honest. This scene is memorable because it is when we start to see his determination and we believe he will eventually get to the bottom of it.

How did the director/writer/actor make this character stand out? Having Jack Nicholson play the part certainly helps but in addition to that this character stands out because he’s multidimensional.  He isn’t just the cliché private eye stalking people’s personal lives for money. There’s more to him. He gets beat up a lot through the film (including one pretty nasty nose cut) but he never gives up. He is driven by the truth–not just the paycheck. All of this but he’s in no way perfect which makes us like him even more. The writer makes him human and relatable through little things like having him tell bad jokes and talking when he shouldn’t be like when the person he’s talking about is standing behind him and bigger things like struggling with his own feelings of inadequacy when confronted by others (like in the barber shop) who question his career choice. Jack Nicholson is believable as a real person trying to solve a mystery and he is able to keep us there with him, even when he seems to know more than we know.

Mrs. Mulwray is another compelling, dynamic and multidimensional character. She is a beautiful, wealthy woman but she often seems nervous and her actions are suspicious hinting to something hidden beneath the surface.

What does she want?  At first, Mrs. Mulwray seems like she simply wants to be left alone, to uphold her family’s reputation and privacy and to come across as dignified. But as the story unfolds, we learn that she actually wants to escape her father’s evil and powerfully far reaching grasp and be free from the secrets and pain she’s been hiding for years. While the situation is dark and complicated, with a child born through incest and rape, in the end we learn Mrs. Mulwray is simply a mother wanting to protect her child.

The action: It’s still so early in the film and yet it’s clear that Mrs. Mulwray is going to be critical to the story when she squirms and then suddenly withdraws her lawsuit threat. It’s natural for her to threaten to sue. After all, this man just slandered her husband and his good name. Right? But to suddenly withdraw the threat so easily seems odd. Later, when Jake questions Mrs. Mulwray about her family, specifically her father, Mrs. Mulwray starts squirming again and accidentally lights 2 cigarettes. This is a smaller detail but shows how nervous she is talking about it. These two incidents show there is more to her story and what she isn’t saying becomes even more important.

How did the director/writer/actor make this character stand out? First, the way in which she’s introduced to us begs for our attention. Because a fake Mrs. Mulwray initially hires Jake to catch her “alleged” cheating husband in the act, when we meet the “real” Mrs. Mulwray we have to wonder what the heck is going on? This moment is memorable because it is the first time we, as viewers, are forced to lose our footing. From this point on small details get dropped like breadcrumbs in regards to Mrs. Mulwray’s character and history. By giving us small pieces at a time and keeping us confused, we also stay captivated. Faye Dunaway also does a great job in coming across strong and weak at the same time. While we know she’s hiding something, she also seems broken and we can’t help but like her.

Final Note: I found these two characters most compelling together because of their interesting juxtaposition. While one does whatever he can to get to the truth, the other will do whatever it takes to hide it. They end up in bed together and while we can’t be sure if that’s natural or just another chess move for one or both of them, it’s a critical moment because all the pieces to the murder mystery and Mrs. Mulwray’s dark history start coming together more quickly from this point. I’d never seen this movie before and I really enjoyed it. I’ve always been more of a happily-ever-after girl myself but the ending was grippingly sad and, I think, really fit the film. Mrs. Mulwray dies trying to protect her daughter while Jake discovers the whole truth. While both characters fulfill their destinies, both do so in vain since neither gets a happy ending and justice is not served.

To the girl at the supermarket

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I said hello and smiled through you

And you eagerly smiled back before

Mine melted away

Into your molten scarred unrecognizable face

An innocent smile instantly replaced with sadness since

I could not hide my horror, then my shame

I peered up and down aisle after aisle

Slowly filling my cart while searching and

Wondering—how could I?

And if and how could I correct my transgression?

Should I apologize or simply start over and try again?

Offer up a joke or a note about the weather?

I wanted…

I needed another chance to prove I’m not that person

To you

To me

To the guy cleaning up in aisle three

But neither of us knows me evidently

Or even well enough to know I’d react that way

Or that I’d care this much about a complete stranger

Or that I’d obsess over you and then somehow forget you

Before suddenly spotting you again

In the last aisle

My last chance

But face to face I froze again before making amends

I was immersed in fear again

I smiled that same stupid smile again

This time sincerely hoping it might hide

My insincerity, my regret and my fear

But it didn’t.

I wanted to tell you I didn’t mean to hurt you

But my pathetic face failed us both

And you let me know I missed my chance to make it up

To you—oh who am I kidding?

To me!

This time, you didn’t smile back

This time, you looked through me

And I deserved it

I had my chance to be a better me

And I blew it

I’m so sorry.

For the Birds

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Iowa is great for bird watching!

In fact, though I’ve always loved birds (especially ducks — they’re my all-time favorite animal), I had no idea how much I loved them until we moved here.

Birds are amazing. I love to watch them fly and land, peck, hop, run and more than anything I love to listen to them sing. It’s so beautiful waking up to their joyful song amidst the morning breeze and rustling of the trees.

My husband and I have really embraced our new aviary friends and even purchased a bird feeder (then another soon after) so that we can appreciate the birds even more. Now we get to watch them from our front window! And since spring has sprung, it seems we have become a bird haven. It’s awesome.

I even started appreciating some more than others. I love this one particular red bird best who visits us. Jason says it’s a cardinal. I don’t really care what he is; I just know I love him. He’s a brilliant reddish orange. And I adore this group of small black birds who fly by every day and land in the field across the street. They’re not just black; they look like they’re wearing black, red and yellow striped tuxedo jackets — so stylish! And when they extend their wings, it’s majestic. I also love these cute little bright yellow finches. They are so cute and happy. Jason really likes these cool looking blue ones, though I forget what he called them. And orioles… we’ve seen a lot of those and he and I both like those, too.

Anyway, we’ve been getting curious about which birds have been visiting us most and in learning more about them. So we started researching. In doing so, we’ve learned a lot of neat local bird factoids.

But of everything I’ve learned on the topic, the names have to be my favorite. Some seem pretty standard and I’ve certainly heard, if not seen, most of them before. But others… well, others are FAR more interesting. And by “interesting” I mean hilarious.

Seriously, whoever came up with these names was either high at the time, had their minds in the gutter or simply had a sick sense of humor.

Either way, I appreciate the outcome.

Here’s a list of my favorite funny bird names, some new and others newly appreciated now that I’m thinking about it:

  • Dickcissel
  • Tufted Titmouse
  • Swallow
  • Chickadee
  • Killdeer
  • Ruddy Duck
  • Loon
  • Hairy Woodpecker
  • Coot
  • Magpie
  • Wood Thrush
  • Red Faced Booby
  • Grosbeak
  • Zitting Cisticola
  • Scrub Jay
  • Clark’s Nutcracker
  • Northern Screamer
  • Brown Trembler
  • Fluffy Backed Tit Babbler
  • Cuckoo
  • Shag
  • Thicknees
  • Agile Tit-tyrant
  • Morepork
  • Wild Turkey
  • Turdus
  • Cock-of-the-rock
  • Penduline Tits
  • Wrentit

Seriously. Who comes up with this stuff?!?!

“Facts” by Philip Levine (Poem Analysis)

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When I first read this poem, it seemed so simple and straightforward. It’s just a bunch of random facts, right? Instinctually, I felt there was more to it. So I tried my best to break it down…

In each stanza of this poem, Levine uses the first two lines to state what seems like a random fact and then he uses the last two lines to add a sort of sarcastic, snarky or even just funny or interesting attitude or note about the fact previously stated. Most of the words he selects are either one or two syllables. This makes it feel simple as if he wants us to think these are just simple, separate facts and yet when read together they don’t seem so simple. I felt like I had been fed a bunch of facts and, yet, I was missing the point. Maybe that was the point. Maybe he wants us to question the facts.

I enjoyed the rhythm. It felt like he was rambling on (much like I’m doing now) and reminded me of all the times I’ve gotten stuck sitting beside a seemingly crazy person on an airplane. But as I continued reading, he seemed less crazy and more interesting much like most of my experiences with inflight insanity. Similarly, just when the poem started making sense, the plane landed. I found this both frustrating and addictive.

The way Levine switches back and forth between past, present and future tense struck me as pleasant somehow. It felt so natural and conversational and not at all stuffy or formal. He also shifts between first, second and third person. Depending on whether he started a line or thought with “I” or “We” or “You” or an ambiguous he/she/it felt important. When he separated “—if you’re scared—” from everything else using dashes, it felt like he was talking to me specifically and I found myself paying closer attention, wanting to prove I wasn’t scared to tackle this.

Levine uses inflection and rhythm masterfully. He repeats certain words and phrases for emphasis, like Cleveland and Rolls Royce for examples, bringing attention to their importance. He states facts about places and things and by repeating them or by illuminating their rhythms through alliteration or consonance (“perfect grill for a Rolls Royce” or “the coldest I’ve ever been is in Cleveland” or “the citizens of Cleveland passed me sullenly”) they start to feel connected like memories along a journey. The Rolls Royce might signify the car industry which could connect all the other places he mentions back to Detroit, his home town and first spot on his journey. He also mentions several types of transportation (Rolls, Dinky, bus, train, walking) and that along with the cities is making me think all of it is symbolic of this journey being a major theme.

The poem is made up of eleven stanzas, each with four lines. Fact about me: eleven and four are my lucky numbers—I was born 11/11 and my brother was born 4/4. But just like the facts in this poem, I don’t think this matters to you as much as it matters to me. Similarly, I think the facts in this poem mattered to Levine because they belong to him. But he shares them in such a beautiful, unique and rhythmic way that we can’t help but feel connected. The way he separates his thoughts makes each fact seem separate but of equal importance. This, along with his rhythmic choices, makes it feel so fluid when Levine draws our attention to something or when he refers back and forth between stanzas (i.e., “there are two lies in the previous stanza”) like he’s trying to get us to see the bigger picture.

I keep thinking that if I figure out how to connect the dots, I will eventually have a complete story but doing so “strikes me as an exercise in futility” much like Levine describes living “in Cleveland” or “saving your pennies to buy a Rolls Royce.”

This poem started to drive me crazy. I’ve read it over and over again, and still haven’t figured it out. I went so far as to Google Levine to learn more about him and one thing I found interesting was this quote by him during an NPR interview: “The real challenge is when language, instincts, technique and practice come together. You have to follow where the poem leads. And it will surprise you. It will say things you didn’t expect it to say. And you look at the poem and you realize, ‘That is truly what I felt.’ That is truly what I saw.”

I admit I’m no poet (at least not yet) but I was surprised by how strongly I felt about this poem. In trying to dissect it, I found myself getting more and more confused by the facts while my emotional connection to them became stronger and crisper. I fell in love with this one.

“Last Night in Montreal”

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Project: Choose any section of dialogue from the novel “Last Night in Montreal” and discuss why it works.

Pages 67-68

At this point in the novel we get a glimpse of who Christopher is, or who we think he is anyway, through a conversation with Peter.

Peter comes across as a “good guy,” the one who has been trying to find the lost girl. So, by association and from the faith Peter exhibits for Christopher in this conversation, we believe Christopher must also be a “good guy.” Peter likes Christopher and nothing seems odd or out of order about him at this point, so we like him too. We get the feeling he might even be the eventual hero who could potentially save the day.

By having Christopher point out that Lilia is “the same age as” his own daughter, Michaela, we can’t help but assume that similarity would make him feel even more connected to the case. Looking back, who would have guessed that his connection would turn into obsession and cause him to eventually ignore and abandon his own child?

While we might wonder why Peter needs Christopher’s help, Christopher does not. If the case is “solvable” as Peter put it, why has he not yet been able to solve it? In hindsight, his dialogue may have been a clue about the tension and conflict to come and maybe even a sign that Peter, too, had been obsessed with the case. His words and his tone lead to this conclusion. He sounded physically and emotionally exhausted, like he’d tried everything. That would explain why Peter sought out Christopher’s help. Peter mentioned in this conversation that his own wife, Anya, had recently left him. Was that possibly due to his obsession with the case? Was this foreshadowing for what would eventually happen to Christopher?

Without questioning any of this, Christopher seems confident that he will have no problem getting to the bottom of it. With the clue (the torn Bible page on which Lilia had scribbled the note) in hand, Christopher says “Good lord. I could find her in ten minutes with something like this.” He boasts that it’ll be easy to find Lilia. Maybe he’s being overly confident or maybe he simply doesn’t get it at that point. What’s interesting to me is that Peter doesn’t try to defend why it’s taken him so long or why he still hasn’t solved the case. Shouldn’t Christopher’s comment have caused a reaction in Peter? I would have thought so but Peter just lets the comment slide by which seems unusual. I couldn’t help but think he held his tongue because he was ready to move on, to be done with it already. He wanted his life back and he recognized Christopher as his only hope.

Of course, even at this early point in the novel, we know it’s not going to be easy for Christopher. It can’t possibly be as easy as he thinks it’ll be or what would the book be about? Still we are instantly interested in seeing the story unfold, getting to know Christopher better and experiencing the challenges he’s bound to face along the way. We want him to succeed if it means he’ll be helping Lilia but we also want him to grow and teach us a thing or two along the way.

In two brief pages of dialogue, we learn so much about Peter and Christopher. We get critical information to look back at later and we know that Christopher is going to be an important character. Of course, at this point in the story, we have no way of predicting how much searching for Lilia will change Christopher and/or our feelings about him, how obsessed he will eventually become or how his mission to “save” Lilia, who as it turns out in the end had already been saved by her brother and father, will so negatively impact his life, his health and his family.

“Last Night in Montreal”

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My first MFA course is winding down so I thought this would be as good a time as any to start sharing projects. Here’s one from a novel I really enjoyed reading…

Project: Select a character from the novel “Last Night in Montreal” and discuss whether or not that character is compelling. Explain why or why not.

Private Investigator Christopher Grayden’s daughter, Michaela, has such a profound purpose in the novel Last Night in Montreal. I found her compelling in large part because of her many parallels and juxtaposition to Lilia and because of the level and sincerity of her pain throughout the story.

As we read, we cannot help but be drawn to Lilia. She is the main character and all eyes are on her and, just like every other character in the book, we, too, can’t help but feel that she needs our help. She’s just a little girl, fragile and helpless but throughout the course of the novel, we see her grow into a woman. We get to experience her strength, resolve, intelligence and we understand how much she is truly loved.

After a while, we learn that there is really no reason to worry about Lilia. What we may have missed though along the way, as the other characters seem to have missed too, is how much Michaela needs help. She is just a little girl, too, just like Lilia, when she gets abandoned by not one but both of her parents. While Lilia has her father guiding, providing and loving her, Michaela has no one. She is left to fend for herself while everyone focuses on Lilia.

While everyone searches for a lost Lilia, paying close attention to her, sniffing out and following clues along the way, Michaela is being ignored as she cries out for help. She begs for attention, in a positive way at first, by getting good grades and even showing an interest in the circus, something her mother and father were once interested in. When positive doesn’t work, she shifts to more desperate measures and starts acting out like any kid in her position would do. Michaela is dropping clues of her own left and right, begging for help, but she is being ignored. She is desperate for anyone to love her and pay attention to her, but she never gets that. In the story, she starts to show us signs that she is jealous of Lilia and who could blame her? While this may cause the reader to dislike her (or even fear more for Lilia as we can’t help but wonder if Michaela’s jealousy will lead to an act of violence against Lilia) at first, once we start to understand Michaela better and see how fragile and shattered she is, then we begin to truly understand her and want to save her, too. But just like the characters in the story, specifically Michaela’s own father and Eli, by the time we realize she needs our help, it’s too late. 

Michaela’s climactic death took my breath away and changed my whole focus as well as what I’d previously resolved in my mind as the purpose, plot and path of the novel. In addition to how she affects us as readers, we also get to see and experience how she affects the other characters in the novel. While some characters grow because of her existence causing us to perhaps like them more, like Eli for example, other characters show weaker, uglier sides of themselves. When Michaela is speaking to her father and says “You’ve been chasing her since we were both eleven years old” it’s like she is spelling out what’s wrong with this picture. I personally wanted to shake Christopher and scream, “Can’t you see what you’re doing to your own daughter?”

While everyone, including the reader, is focused on and busy feeling one thing or another for Lilia (whether it be the feelings of unconditional love and concern from her own father, fear and hope from her brother, jealousy from Michaela and her mother, love and infatuation from Eli, or an addictive competitive desire to save her from Christopher), Michaela is ignored and lost in the shuffle.

Lilia is able to eventually grow up and find herself perhaps because she has people loving, helping and guiding her along the way, while Michaela is on a lonely one way path toward destruction. While all eyes are on Lilia, Michaela is the one left truly abandoned, alone, broken and lost along the way.

Flea Diddy

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The other night I had a dream in which my husband, Jason, brought home a dog and we named him Flea Diddy. I told him about the dream when I woke up and we both laughed. I thought it was so randomly funny that I told a few friends in conversation and I even posted it on Facebook and a friend replied, “You dream in humor, nice.”

It was rather nice. Not all of them are. I have my fair share of nightmares but usually I’m quite fond of my dreams. They are such a wonderful part of life. Don’t you agree? In a completely relaxed state, we get to visualize ourselves being and doing and achieving all sorts of magnificent things.

Sometimes, my dreams are funny.  This time, yes. I laughed a long time over Flea Diddy. Awake, I even came up with a name for his kitty sidekick: Fluff Daddy.

But, like I said, I have a variety of different types of dreams…

Happy. Sad. Occasionally scary (especially if I eat pepperoni). Hyper.Playful. Exciting. Romantic. Sexy. Sexier. Pornographic. Weird. Supernatural. Fun. Futuristic. Adventurous. Childish. Black and white and/or color, depending on the genre. Just me or featuring friends, family, strangers—sometimes with feet and sometimes without. Vivid. Interesting. Musical. Informative. Inexplicable. Random. Not so random. Memories. De ja vue. Even predictive.

I believe dreams are a connection to our subconscious. At times, my subconscious can be pretty intense. It would have to be with so much fact and fiction being simultaneously digested in there. Awake, I can tell the difference between reality and one of my novels but I’m not sure my dreams can separate the two. So whether it’s real or make believe, if it’s floating round in my brain somewhere, chances are I have or I’m going to eventually dream about it.

I’ve even learned to use my dreams to help my writing. When I get writer’s block, I’ll often opt to take a nap to break through it. Usually this works. I have had numerous literary revelations while zonked out and slobbering on my pillow. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve woken up in the middle of the night ready to write with enough detailed inspiration that I was able to do so for hours. I have instantaneously gone from a sound sleep in the dead of night to wide awake and was still typing away while watching the sun rise.

One bad part is that I talk in my sleep so even if I don’t remember a particular dream when I wake up, chances are my husband will. He can tell you stories! He has a few favorites—one about a “cantaloupe juggling machine,” for example. I have some pretty interesting, and at times crazy, dreams. Don’t we all? This has been going on for as long as I can remember. My college roommate has a few choice selections of her own that she would be happy to share. I’m sure my mom probably does, too.

Since I usually remember my dreams even without assistance, I try to get the most out of them as possible. I definitely refer to ideas from dreams in my writing and even in everyday conversation. I love talking about dreams, mine and yours, and especially the really juicy ones!  I’ve made it a point to write mine down whenever possible or jot notes here and there so that I don’t forget the really good ones.

Over time, my dreams have become clearer and crisper and, to me, more interesting and useful. I’ve even subscribed to a few dream sequels and a dream series or two. To get myself to continue a really good dream, I just focus on whatever it is I want to dream about while in bed and when I start to drift away, I visualize and try to control the topic. It’s like sleepy time meditation or setting my dream DVR.

While I can’t always control my dreams or my inspiration for my dreams, I can control what I do with them. I believe dreams are a special gift we all have been given to use however we wish. We can use them to dive deeper into our own minds and learn more about ourselves or we can use them for entertainment purposes only. Personally, I like to do a little of both.

I’m not sure if Flea Diddy, the dog of my dreams, will work his way into one of my stories. But it was certainly nice dreaming about him and analyzing what he and the rest of my dreams mean to me.